Lawrence withdrew the twelve inch blade from the servant's chest, swung
it high and then thrust it hard into servant's neck. He repeated this action
twelve times, sending chucks of warm flesh flying through the air of his
chambers. The servant's head was now completely severed. Blood gushed out
of the gaping wound.
"That'll teach you to put too much cream in my coffee!" The diabolically
dark lord shouted, standing and looking down at the reddened corpse. The
servant's eyes watered and then closed. "Ha ha harr!!!"
Lawrence walked over to his desk, sat in the sumptuous leather chair and
spoke into the communications panel. "Servant four?"
"Yes, oh lord of death?"
"There is a mutilated body in my secret chambers. Come and clean up
"Yes my lord."
"Come now!" Lawrence screamed satanically.
"Of course, my lord."
The massive communications screen on the wall opposite the desk flickered
to life. "My lord." The face on the screen said. It was General
Bloatbucket, the commander of Lawrence's mother ship.
"What is it, general?"
"We have established contact with Kathwoman as you requested. She is
currently at her secret cave hide-out on the decaying world of Morrassi
IX in the Phetorh System."
"Show her on screen." Lawrence commanded.
The full length image of Kathwoman appeared in glorious high definition
colour. She was dressed in seven thick strips of black, shiny leather, strapped
tightly to her chest, waist and thighs. The white, silk head scarf that
she wore looked very out of place.
"What do you want, bastard!" Kathwoman shouted, dropping the decapitated
head of a young virgin that she happened to be holding.
"My dear, such language!" Lawrence said with forced calm. "I
just fancied a chat."
"Oh right! We haven't 'chatted' since we violently split up our evil
underworld more than eighty years ago. What makes you think that I would
be interested in talking to you now?"
"The fact I have located the Palace of Amino."
"Later. First, I need to know if your legions of four armed Neanderthals
are fit and ready to fight."
"Excellent! Join forces with me again and we can destroy all of the
bounty hunters once and for all."
"Why should I?"
"It's obvious. With the bounty hunters annihilated, we can rape and
pillage to our hearts content."
"It does sound tempting."
"It's more than tempting, it's necessary!"
"OK, but if you're planning any tricks, forget it! I'll simply slice
you up like a cucumber!"
"Really? Sounds quite sordid."
"Get back to the subject!"
"We need to meet and discuss my plans."
"OK, but only at a location that I choose."
"Within the Substantia Zone."
"You choose the system, I choose the zone."
"Fair enough. Let me think…" Kathwoman thought for a brief
moment. "We shall meet within the Murkite cave at the summit of Medial
Peak at the centre of the Copus Canyons of the northern continent on Epicuro,
the seventh and outermost moon of Sanctius, the largest known gas giant
and fourth planet of the Ephluvii System."
"Excellent! We will meet there in twenty four hours!"
"Bring your entire fleet and your foul legions."
"Of course. See you there. Don't be late!"
The image of Kathwoman faded briskly.
"Ha ha harr!" Lawrence bellowed. He continued to laugh for many minutes.
"General Bloatbucket?" Lawrence said, finally recovering from
"Yes, my lord?"
"Take us to the Ephluvii System."
"Yes, my lord."
"Now!" Lawrence screamed, his face burning with fury.
A few seconds later, the powerful engines of the mother ship rumbled to
life. Lawrence started to skip around his chambers chanting inanely;
Once my plans are put in action,
They will start a chain reaction,
Wham! Bam! Devastation,
The final blow to the bounty nation.